Step Book - 7th Step:

"Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."

(Excerpt) - I.

Since this step specifically addresses humility, let us consider here what humility is and what practicing it means for us. 
Indeed, attaining deeper humility is the fundamental principle of all Twelve A.A. steps. Without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can remain sober at all. Almost every A.A. member has found that if they do not acquire much more of this valuable quality than is necessary for mere sobriety, there is little chance of achieving genuine happiness. Without it, one cannot live purposefully and usefully or possess the strong faith necessary to face any emergency during difficult times.

Humility, as a concept and an ideal, has a bad reputation nowadays. Many misunderstand the idea, and the very word often enjoys hatred. Many people have only a vague understanding of humility as a lifestyle. Our everyday speech and reading are primarily filled with pride in human achievements. [...]

Surely, no alcoholic wishes to belittle material accomplishments—especially not an A.A. member. We do not intend to argue with those who passionately cling to the belief that the primary purpose of life is the satisfaction of our basic instincts. However, we are certain that no group of humanity has fallen into a greater pit than alcoholics by following these principles. For millennia, we demanded more security, more prestige, and more gentleness than we were entitled to. When we achieved success, we drank to dream of even greater things. When our hopes were dashed—at least partially—we drank to forget. There was never enough of what we thought we needed.  
In all this often well-meaning effort, the lack of humility weighed down on us like a paralyzing burden. We did not see the need for character-building and spiritual values to come first, or that the true purpose of life is not material satisfaction. It was typical of us to do everything possible to confuse ends and means. Instead of viewing the satisfaction of our physical desires as a means through which we could function as human beings, we made it the purpose and meaning of our lives.  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 71-72]

Step Book - 7th Step  

(Excerpt) - II.

It is true that most of us believed a strong character was desirable, but only because it was necessary for the fulfillment of our desires. If we demonstrated sufficient honesty and morality outwardly, we had a better chance of achieving what we wanted. But when we had to choose between character and comfort, character-building was lost in the haze of happiness-seeking dust. We rarely viewed character-building as inherently desirable, something we would strive for regardless of whether we satisfied our instincts or not. We never thought of making honesty, patience, and the true love of humanity and God the foundation of our daily lives.

The lack of attachment to enduring values—essentially a blindness to the true purpose of our lives—had another bad consequence. As long as we were convinced that we could live relying solely on our own strength and intelligence, attaining a fruitful faith in a Higher Power was impossible. This was true even if we believed in God's existence. We could have a sincere religious faith, but it remained barren because we tried to play God. As long as we placed self-reliance first, there could be no authentic reliance on a Higher Power. The fundamental requirement of humility was lacking: the desire to know and fulfill God's will.  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 73]

Step Book - 7th Step  

(Excerpt) - III.

Achieving a new perspective seemed incredibly painful for us. It was only through repeated humiliations that we were forced to learn some humility. Only at the end of a long road marked by constant humiliations, embarrassments, and the collapse of our arrogance did we begin to feel that humility was more than a desperate crawl. In A.A., every new member hears, and soon realizes for themselves, that the humble acknowledgment of our helplessness in the face of alcohol is the first step toward freeing ourselves from this paralyzing trap.

Thus, for the first time in our lives, we recognized the necessity of humility. But this was only the beginning of beginnings. For most of us, shedding the disgust of humility, recognizing that humility leads to the liberation of the human spirit, and being ready to make an effort to achieve humility—something inherently desirable—took a long, long time. A way of life geared toward self-seeking cannot be changed overnight. At first, we faced the constant threat of rebellion.

When we finally admit without reservation that we are helpless against alcohol, we can breathe more freely and say, "Thank God, that's over! I never have to go through that again!" Later, we learn, often to our greatest astonishment, that this is just the first milestone on the new path.  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 74]

Step Book - 7th Step  

(Excerpt) - IV.

Still motivated by necessity, we reluctantly must confront those serious character flaws that originally led us to drink. We must deal with these shortcomings to avoid falling back into alcoholism. We would like to rid ourselves of some of our flaws, but in certain cases, this seems impossible, and we shrink back. We also cling passionately to other flaws—even though they disturb our spiritual balance—because we find pleasure in them. How will we be able to muster enough determination and willingness to rid ourselves of such overwhelming compulsion and desires?

Once again, we draw from A.A. experience: we must want to, or we will fall out of the struggle. At this stage of our development, we are under great pressure and compulsion to act rightly. We are forced to choose between the agony of trying and the sure punishment we will receive if we do not try. We reluctantly take these initial steps, yet we do. We may not have a very good opinion of humility as a desirable virtue yet, but we do recognize it as essential to our survival.

When we bravely confront some of our flaws, discuss them with others, and show a willingness to be rid of them, our opinion of humility begins to change. At this point, we likely have already experienced some relief from the weight of our most devastating shortcomings. We have moments when we feel a sensation akin to true inner peace. For those of us who have only known anxiety, depression, or fear until now— in other words, for all of us—this newly discovered peace is an invaluable gift.

We have gained something new. While we previously viewed humility as something forcefully imposed upon us, we now see it as nourishing sustenance capable of providing inner peace.  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 74-75]

Step Book - 7th Step  

(Excerpt) - V.

Our more favorable understanding of humility initiates another revolutionary change in our perspective. Our eyes open to see what values have emerged from the painful draining of our selves. Until now, our lives have largely consisted of fleeing from pain and problems. We ran from them like the plague. We wanted nothing to do with suffering. We found refuge in the glass and believed we had found the solution there. Building character through suffering was for saints. We were indifferent to it.

Then, in A.A., our eyes and ears opened. We saw everywhere that the negative of failure and misery had turned into a value through humility. Story after story was shared: how humility drew strength from weakness. In every case, pain was the price of entry into the new life. But this entrance fee paid off beyond expectation. It yielded humility, which we soon discovered was a remedy for pain. We felt less and less pain and desired humility more than ever.

As we learned more about humility, the most fundamental result was a change in our view of God. This was true whether we were believers or non-believers. We began to abandon the perspective that God was some sort of rescuer we called upon only in emergencies. The idea that we lived our lives on our own, with God assisting here and there, began to fade. Many of us, who considered ourselves religious, became aware of the limitations of this viewpoint. By refusing to place God first, we deprived ourselves of His help. But now the words: "Of myself I am nothing. My Father does the work," have become promising and significant.

We saw that we do not need to be beaten down for life to force humility upon us. It can come through reaching for it, but it can also come at the cost of relentless suffering. It was a turning point in our lives when we began to seek humility because we wanted it, not simply because it was absolutely necessary. At this moment, we began to understand the significance of the Seventh Step: "Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings."  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 75-77]

Step Book - 7th Step  

(Excerpt) - VI.

As we approach the Seventh Step, it is good for us A.A. members to examine once more what our fundamental goals are. We all wish to live in peace with ourselves and our fellow human beings. We want to be assured that God's grace can provide what we cannot achieve on our own. We have seen that our character flaws, which are based on shortsighted and unworthy desires, are merely obstacles to achieving our goals. We now clearly see that we have made unreasonable demands of ourselves, others, and God.

The main driver of our flaws has been self-centered fear—we primarily feared losing something we thought was ours or failing to attain something we demanded. We based our lives on unfulfilled demands, living in constant turmoil and disappointment. Therefore, we could not have peace until we found a way to reduce our demands. The difference between a demand and a simple request is evident to everyone.  
The Seventh Step is when we change our behavior.

This step allows us, with humility as our guide, to step out of ourselves toward others and God. In the Seventh Step, the main emphasis is on humility. Ultimately, it says: let us be willing to try to be rid of our remaining shortcomings through humility. After all, we have already done this when we acknowledged our helplessness against alcohol and came to the conviction that a Power greater than ourselves could restore our spiritual health.

If this degree of humility has enabled us to find the grace through which we can dispel this deadly obsession, then we can certainly hope for similar results in solving any problem in our lives.  
[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 77-78]