Step Book - Step 4: "We made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves." (Excerpt) - I.

The Creator did not give us our instincts without purpose. Without them, we could not be whole human beings. If a person were not concerned with creating safety around them, harvesting crops, and building shelter over their heads, they would not survive even a single winter. If we did not reproduce, the Earth would not be populated. Without the social instinct, if we did not seek each other's company, there would be no society. The desires nourished by our instincts—sexual relationships, material and emotional security, companionship—are necessary and appropriate, and it is certain that they come from God.

Yet, these instincts, which are so vital to our existence, often exceed their normal role. They drive us powerfully, blindly, or even insidiously; they take control of us and try to direct our lives. Our sexual desires, our striving for material and emotional security, and our yearning for important social roles often become tyrants. Thus, when our natural desires exceed their bounds, they frequently—practically in every case—cause trouble. There is no person, no matter how good, who is free from such troubles. Almost every serious emotional problem can be seen as a misguided instinct. In this case, our instincts—nature's great treasures—become physical and spiritual burdens.

The Fourth Step is a powerful and diligent effort to discover what these burdens have been within us in the past and what they are now. We want to know exactly where and how our natural desires have led us astray. We want to confront the unhappiness we have caused others and ourselves. By revealing our emotional distortions, we can begin to correct them. Without this persistent endeavor, we cannot expect to find much in the way of either sanity or satisfaction. Most of us have found that without a searching and brave moral inventory, we fall far short of the faith that affects our daily lives.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 43-44]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - II. (Excuses to Avoid the Inventory)

Alcoholics, in particular, need to understand that the cause of their self-destructive drinking lies in their runaway instincts. We drank to drown our fears, failures, and depression in alcohol. We drank to escape the guilt caused by our passions, then we drank again to indulge in those passions. We drank out of vanity, to revel in our deceptive dreams. Such spiritual perversion is not a pretty sight. Rampant instincts do not tolerate analysis. As we attempt to penetrate to their depths, they can provoke severe reactions.

If we are prone to gloominess, we sink into guilt and self-pity. We wallow in this swamp with a painful delight. As we obsessively continue this morose activity, we can sink so deeply in despair that the only solution left is forgetfulness. By then, we have naturally lost our perspective and all genuine humility. This is nothing but pride turned inside out. It is not a moral inventory but the same process that often drives the gloomy to drinking and destruction.

On the other hand, if our nature leans toward arrogance and hypocrisy, we react in exactly the opposite way. The very thought of the moral inventory suggested by A.A. outrages us. Without a doubt, we will proudly proclaim what a good life we have lived—at least we thought so before alcohol brought us down. We will assert that our character defects—if we even admit to having any—are mainly caused by excessive drinking. From this, we conclude that we need to strive only for sobriety, first, last, and always. We believe that as soon as we stop drinking, our former impeccable character will spring to life. After all, if we were decent people except for drinking, why should we now delve into the past when we are already sober? 

We can find other excuses to avoid the inventory.

Clearly, our anxieties and troubles are caused by others: they are the ones who truly need the moral inventory! We firmly believe that if we were treated better, everything would turn out fine. We are not the guilty ones; they are.

At this stage of the moral inventory, our sponsors are quick to help us. They can do so because they have experienced the Fourth Step, as tried by A.A....

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 45-47]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - III.

At this stage of the moral inventory, our sponsors are quick to help us. They can do so because they have experienced the Fourth Step, as tried by A.A. They reassure the one prone to gloom that their case is not exceptional, not different from others, and likely their faults are no more numerous than anyone else's in the A.A. group. The sponsor willingly demonstrates this by talking about their own past and present faults, without shame, but also without the pleasure of airing grievances. Their calm, realistic inventory is very reassuring.

The sponsor will likely point out that, despite our friend's shortcomings, they also have good qualities. This dispels their morbid gloom and helps restore their spiritual balance. Our new companion, as they become more objective, can face their faults with courage instead of fear. 

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 47]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - IV. (Our Attempts to Avoid the Inventory)

Sponsors have a different problem with those who are stubborn and insist they do not need to account for their faults. This is because those driven by arrogance remain blind to their shortcomings. They do not need consolation. The sponsor's task is to find a small crack in their wall of arrogance through which the sunlight of reason can penetrate.

Above all, the sponsor can tell them that most A.A. members have suffered greatly from self-justification. For many of us, this manufactured excuses for drinking and foolish, damaging behavior. We perfected the art of coming up with alibis. We drank because times were tough, or we drank because things were going well. We drank because we felt suffocated in the loving atmosphere of home; or because we felt unloved. We drank to celebrate our work successes, and we drank when a venture failed. We drank when our country won a war, or when we lost peace. It went on like this endlessly. 

We thought the "circumstances" drove us to drink; and when we tried unsuccessfully to correct them, drinking took over us, and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change in order to adapt to all possible circumstances.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 47-48]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - V.

We thought the "circumstances" drove us to drink; and when we tried unsuccessfully to correct them, drinking took over us, and we became alcoholics. It never occurred to us that we needed to change in order to adapt to all possible circumstances. 

In A.A., we learned that we must do something about vengeful resentments, self-pity, and unwarranted pride. We had to realize that whenever we played the big shot, we made others angry with us. 

We also learned that whenever we harbored resentment or plotted revenge, we were hitting ourselves with the club we wanted to use on others. We learned that if something seriously disturbed our spirit, our first task is to calm our anger, regardless of who or what we believe caused it. 

It took time for us to see that we had become victims of our disturbed feelings. We quickly discover these in others; we recognize them slowly within ourselves. First of all, we had to acknowledge that we had many shortcomings: even if this acknowledgment is painful and humiliating. Regarding others, we had to eliminate from our thoughts and speech the phrase "it's your fault." This required serious determination from the very beginning. But once we got past two or three obstacles, the path seemed smoother. We began to see ourselves from a different perspective: in other words, we made progress in humility.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 48]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - VI.

When A.A. proposes a relentless moral inventory, the newcomer feels that they are being asked for more than they can deliver. Whenever they want to look within, their pride and fear hold them back. Their pride says, "You don't need this!"—and their fear says, "Don’t dare look within!" However, according to A.A. experience, both fear and pride turn out to be mere bogeys, nothing more. Once we truly commit ourselves to the inventory and strive to do thorough work, clarity shines on the foggy landscapes of our lives. Through perseverance, a new hope arises within us.

The relief of finally confronting ourselves is indescribable. These are the first fruits of the Fourth Step.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, pp. 50-51]

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Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - VII.

By this time, the new member is likely to draw these conclusions: their character defects—which are essentially deviations of their instincts—were the main causes of their drinking and the failures experienced in life. If they are unwilling to seriously work on eliminating their most glaring faults, they will find neither sobriety nor peace of mind. They must dismantle the inadequate foundations of their life and rebuild them, this time on rock.

Now that they are willing to begin searching for their faults, they will ask: "How do I start? How do I take an inventory of myself?" Since the Fourth Step is nothing more than the beginning of a new life, we suggest that they first examine those shortcomings that are the most glaring and cause the most confusion. By

 the way, the inventory is best to do with a pen and paper in hand.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 51]


Step Book - Step 4 (Excerpt) - VIII.

Some resist such questions because they believe their character defects are not as glaring. We need to tell them that a conscientious self-examination will reveal exactly those flaws they most fear confronting. Although we may not appear too bad on the surface, we often find ourselves embarrassed when we realize this is because we have buried these flaws under a thick layer of self-justification. Whatever these flaws may have been, they ultimately lured us into the tormenting trap of alcoholism.

Therefore, thoroughness should be our motto in preparing this inventory. It is wise to write down our questions and answers. This will help us think clearly and conduct an honest assessment. This will be our first tangible evidence that we genuinely want to make progress.

[12 Steps and 12 Traditions, p. 55]